Tag Archives: diet

Finding the progress even when it feels like nothing is happening.

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Hello! Here we are for out monthly update, and happy thanksgiving to all of my fellow Americans. I can’t believe a few things here:

  1. My dog is still alive. (she has cancer yay, 90 days post op!)
  2. My other dog is still alive. (he’ll be 16 this week whaat)
  3. It’s fucking the end of November.
  4. I skipped over decorating for Thanksgiving and skipped right to the Christmas decorations
  5. I’m capable of (and that I even care about) decorating a house in the midst of my chaotic life

Exciting stuff, I tell you. So.. Facebook memories decided to show me a super horrific picture of me Saturday. It was so bad, that I actually went to the gym for the Saturday WOD instead of going straight to shopping instead. It was a tough sell, but it was a bad picture. I then pestered Tom repeatedly to take some good pictures of me so that I could create what you will see below. I’m sure I was less than thrilled when he sent me the good picture, but now that I have my little timeline collage put together, it all worked out. I am capable of making far more flattering faces, but apparently he didn’t think those were picture-worthy. Thanks, Tom!

Here we go.

Left Photo. First starting CrossFit. I remember hating the picture. Look how fucking ginormous I am. My ass, my arms, my stomach, seriously what the fuck. Look at my clunky tennis shoes, good God, fat lady. Get your shit together.

Middle photo. What you can’t see is that there are like, 2 15lb plates on that lady bar. That puts that weight at a whopping 65 lbs, I know right?! 65lbs for me is laughable now. I can’t even tell you what I do with 65 lbs now. Nothing..? I usually skip right to 95, but that’s cool. 65 lbs on the bar, it is. And I look like I’m riding the struggle bus, hard. And what am I doing, deadlifting?? Seriously, I’m deadlifting 65 lbs here. Great job, lady. Crushing those 65lb deadlifts.

Right photo. I’m getting ready to run my 100m run in our partner relay. Yes, I ran like, 6 times on Saturday! Not usual, not common, but it was the only thing between getting and not getting that red-lettered RX on the board, so I sucked it up. (and my feet have been suffering since, so ridiculous.) And when I say run, I mean like, slow jog. People lapped me several times. Clearly I cared. I’m probably yelling at my teammates here, cheering them on, looking all tough and shit. I imagine this is likely the face I make on a regular basis when I’m out in public. Lady your kid is screaming, what the fuck. Hands on the hips, pissed about something, and looking rather formidable. Or ready to stomp on someone. Or ready to say something inappropriate. So feminine! Such a lady.

On the left, size XL shirt, size XL pants. Giant arms, giant face, giant ass. Belly that went for miles. Entirely miserable. Wondering if I’d ever be good at something. Pretending to be happy. I probably bent over like that thinking it would conceal something on my body. Nope.

Middle. Same. XL everything. Calves so big my socks slouched down. Probably left rings around my ankles.

Right. Size Small t-shirt. Size 10 lululemon. I could wear size 8, but I have too many size 10s I need to wear out. I’m thrilled the size Small shirt was comfortable enough to wear that day.

Carb Nite Bloat, 3 Days Later? – 8/20/14

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I’m STILL not back to my pre-carb nite self.. My stomach feels bloated and puffy (last week it felt flatter and slimmer and smaller, firmer..) and my weight hasn’t budged from 214. I try to rationalize it, like.. oh.. well yesterday I had pooped before I weighed myself and I was 214 and this morning I weighed myself but I hadn’t gone yet.. so surely there’s some value in that! Right..?

I know you’re not supposed to weigh yourself every day. I don’t care. I want to know. I know weight fluctuates (or not..) over time. I also know that I’ve been the same goddamned weight give or take like 5lbs for 2 years now. So.. stripping my body of carbs felt amazing. The results of eliminating most of the carbs from my diet felt incredible! I felt stronger, leaner… and then stuffing my face with crap for a few hours felt terrible, and now my only train of thought is.. WHAT WAS I THINKING?! Why did I do that??? Whyyyyyyyyyy… I could be sitting pretty at 209 or something right now but nooo. Instead, I feel like my body doesn’t work the same way as everyone else’s and well.. those carbs and shit I ate Sunday, it just grabbed onto and HELD onto.

Overreacting. I know. I’m curious to see how the next few days pan out. If I’m not back to my 210 weight (my Day 11 Carb Nite weight) then I’m not carbing up again. Nope. I’ll just go back to what works for me and eliminate the carbs. This whole ‘stuff your face with everything high glycemic’ mumbo jumbo is madness.

Maybe I should read some more of the book instead of just the ‘what to do and when to do it’ part….

So far, I don’t like having a “Carb Nite” – 8/19/14

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Yes, I love having my ‘sweet’ foods once a week as a treat, but… I can’t handle the stuffing that is supposed to occur once a week. I feel a little draggy, a little lethargic from Sunday night’s binge. It could also be the lack of coffee in my system right now..

I was doing so great without any cravings for my 11 days, and today and yesterday the cravings for dried fruit, snacks, whatever, came right back. I’m wondering if this will be this vicious cycle of eliminating cravings and bad food for 6 days, having those bad foods one night, and then starting all over again.

We’ll see how tonight goes with the workout. So far, I’d rather just do a low carb diet eating paleo-ish and clean foods, and have a little something one night a week. We’ll see.

AND my weight spiked back up to 214 yesterday and today. If that shit doesn’t change, then depriving myself of carbs all week long just to binge on Sunday nights and bloat back up will NOT be worth it.

Argh. Just discouraged now.

10 Full Days Eating Ultra Low Carb – 8/17/14

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I started following some guidelines in the book Carb Nite (I apologize, the site is a little scammy and hokey) over the last 10 days. I waited a full 10 days of Ultra Low Carb eating, and decided that the night of Day 11 would be my insulin-spiking feast!

During the 10 days I ate things like,

ground turkey with sauteed onions, mushrooms and red pepper flakes (basically my sweet potato hash minus the sweet potatoes)
Salads with grilled chicken and bleu cheese
Burgers, no bun, with cheese, pickles, lettuce, bacon, mushrooms
eggs, lots of eggs! Hard boiled eggs, scrambled eggs, fried eggs.
Bacon.
fried, unbreaded chicken wings, caprese salads (tomatoes were my biggest source of carbs the last 10 days, for sure.)
grilled steaks, sausages
salads, salads, salads
more eggs, more bacon.
Coffee with cream (I’m drinking dairy again, I couldn’t stay away.) and by cream I mean, half and half, or heavy whipping cream – 2-3 cups of coffee a day
butter! Mmmm butter.
Mozzarella, often with hardboiled eggs. I can eat them in the car, on the go, whenever. As long as I put some salt in that zip lock, we’re good to go.
nuts! walnuts, cashews, almonds

That about covers it. But yeah, my biggest thing was the VERY FIRST DAY. Once I got through the first day, I was good. I missed my dried pineapple, my dried banana chips, my whatevers. Sweet potatoes, rice, etc. But.. once I got through that first day, the rest was smooth sailing.

I’ll tell you about my Carb Nite later. If nothing else, just know I was extremely UNcomfortable last night after all the shit I ate. I can’t believe people eat that way on a regular basis. As in daily. As in multiple times daily. I even stayed mostly gluten free last night too! Miserable.

I will mention that in 10 days’ time I went from 215ish to 210. My lowest on this CrossFit/Paleo journey EVER has been 209. So.. hopefully this insulin spike BS crap that I went through last night will power me past 209. That would be awesome. 🙂 More later!

Day 6 – No starch, no fruit, no sugar – 8/12/14

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Essentially, I am depleting my body of carbs, starches, and sugars in an effort to force it into ketosis, to force it to burn fat instead of the food I’m eating for fuel.  The first day was the hardest, but after that it was no big deal, and so far today has been great too.

My one ‘treat’ has been my BCAAs at night with glutamine, and I may or may not have had a spoonful or 2 or 3 of coconut almond butter.

It’s the beginning basics of Carb Backloading, which I’ve never really tried, and hell, maybe I should. It’s also along the same principle as Carb Nite, which I’ve never tried before either.

Regardless, I feel better. My body is reacting to the slightest amount of starches I consume (whether it’s in sauce inadvertently, or from too many vegetables) I can FEEL it. I’m glad I’ve gotten over that initial hump of wanting dried fruit and starches and whatnot, and now I’m content with not eating it. I don’t want it. I feel better without it. WHOA.

Granted, I only worked out yesterday since I started cutting starches. Tonight will be another determining factor, how it affects my performance; we’re doing heavy C&J today. I’ll keep you posted!

Seeking Advice from my CrossFit Friends – 7/30/14

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Alright.. seeking advice from my Crossfitter friends! What do you all suggest for leaning out/losing fat while still maintaining your strength? I’ve just about had it with myself.

Some info:
I eat pretty well, mostly paleo. I am gluten free. I eat some fruit, some sweet potato, a little dairy/cheese (cream or kerrygold in coffee), a little bit of rice (a bite here and there IF I make it for Dave), beans RARELY, very little processed sugar.

I eat eggs, chicken, ground turkey, broccoli, mushrooms, onions, bacon, for the most part. I’ll splurge on a couple pieces of almost bitter dark chocolate here and there but I prefer to eat dried fruit (natural, no sugar added, organic in place of sweets if I’m craving something, or if a meal is a long ways off). I’ve tried snacking on the whole ‘handful of almonds’ thing to curb my appetite, (that’s a load of BS.)

I haven’t always eaten dried fruit, and incorporating it into my diet hasn’t changed or affected my weight. Meaning, when I didn’t eat it, I still had these issues. Same with the dairy, same with the rice, same with the dark chocolate. When I went strict paleo for 30 days, I lost a few pounds only, and felt AWFUL. When I added the sweet potato back in and laxed up a bit, I felt much better overall and my workouts and strength returned.

I’m always hungry. I drink a crap ton of water. Two cups of coffee a day, iced tea here and there (unsweet). I take all my supplements (glutamine, carnitine, fish oil, taurine, magnesium), I work out 3-4-5 times a week and I always give it everything I’ve got.

Aside from eating nothing but boiled chicken, plain lettuce and broccoli.. what are your recommendations? I have been willing these last 30lbs to drop, but the last time I lost 5lbs by cutting carbs out entirely and going strict paleo, I felt like I was going to pass out all the time. (lightheaded, dizzy, had a hard time lifting anything heavy…) Would love to hear some suggestions from people I haven’t necessarily asked. THANK YOU!