Trying to re-capture my excitement from my 14.4 experience is difficult, especially as I sit here with a chore list a million miles long. (We leave for Miami tomorrow.)

BUT.. I was ecstatic! What WAS 14.4? Well, if you follow crossfit, you’re probably sick of hearing about it already, but here it is:

In 14 min, complete as many rounds of the following as possible:

60 calorie row
50 T2B
40 wall balls (20/14)
30 cleans
20 MUs

Well.. hah.. I stopped dead in my tracks at the toes to bar. FIFTY??? Ugh…. okay. There go my hands.

Last year, I was happy to get through 19 TOTAL.. as in, a set of 3, a set of 6, and then a set of 9, and then 1 of the set of 12. Yeah. and those were broken up. I remember how miserable I was. I remember people standing around me, Chad, Tom, Thomas. Pushing me to keep going. Ugh. How embarrassed I was for sucking so badly. I didn’t want to relive that.

I told Tom that I wanted him and only him to judge me, and I didn’t want there to be a lot of people around, because that encouragement is more frustrating than it is encouraging. And for people who are really good at everything, they don’t get it. They don’t know what it’s like to be the fat girl who does crossfit who is really doing the best she can without falling apart at the seams.

So.. I went into the gym around 4ish. Knowing full well I wouldn’t be wodding at 4, or at 5p.. But 6p? Yes.. maybe that would work. Nobody stays for the 6p classes! Everyone wants to go out and party and do stupid shit, so yes.. 6p on a Friday, in Jax Beach. Perfect.

I went in, hung out, stretched, wandered, cheered others on (yeah yeah I know.. more encouragement than anything else. Total hypocrite here.) I feel it’s my role as the strong, fat crossfit chick to cheer others on. I dunno. I do it.

So finally I’m ready. I have been talked into wearing gloves, and then I decided to tape up my hands too, and then put the gloves OVER the tape. GENIUS!!!! I need to buy gloves, let’s just leave it at that.

I basically warmed up on the rower. Elizabeth started cheering me on, and I stopped her right away. “Elizabeth, please don’t. Not this time.” I said in between rows. She immediately quieted down, and was awesome enough for asking others to be quiet as well. (THANK YOU!!!) Basically, I had like 5 people standing around watching me quietly, haha. The only person I wanted to hear was Tom. I could see others watching, but I didn’t care, because I was going at the pace I was comfortable with. Once I got off the rower and got ready for my T2B, I prepared myself for the worst. My hands were going to hurt, possibly tear, rip and bleed all over the damn place, (inside the tape and gloves.)

My first T2B I did back to back. WHOA! I need to just do one at a time here. So I did the classic Marc Spinks move. Jump up and grab on to the bar, kip, stick your butt back, bring your toes up to the bar, jump down. Once on the ground, flip around, and repeat, except facing the other direction.

It became a pinwheel. Could probably make people dizzy, but it’s how I kept going. One after another after another. Tom commented over and over how strong my T2B were, and how much power I had in them. I was completely relieved and floored at his compliment, and appreciative. He knows how to motivate and encourage without making me feel like a douchebag, or like a failure. I could talk to him and ask him questions, and he’d answer them, and we’d keep going. “How much time is left?” “What number am I on?” etc.

I didn’t miss a single one. People were standing around watching. I wonder what they were thinking. “Damn I can’t believe that fat chick can do those toes to bar..” “I wonder if she’ll get a better score than me.”

(I had watched two leaner, lighter people earlier not finish their T2B, and that scared the shit out of me. If they couldn’t do it, how the hell could I do it???)

But I kept going. And then I reached my 50. It was a fucking miracle. Not a single “no-rep” either. I didn’t want to waste ANY of my effort on a no-rep. That wouldn’t work for me! At the 50 mark, it was 13 minutes. I had one minute left.

(At one point, in my last 10 reps of Toes to Bar, I heard Tom yell to someone to grab me a wall ball. He was confident that I would finish and go on to do my wall balls)

So.. with my wall ball in place, I began. And it was SO LIGHT! Why?? Because it was 14lbs. We always ALWAYS train with a 16lb wall ball. That 2lbs missing made that shit feel weightless. And I killed it. Did 16 unbroken wall balls in like, 40 seconds, took a breath, picked up my med ball again and did 10 more. I did 26 fucking wall balls in under a minute. AND I WAS DONE.

I could’ve totally done one more, but that’s okay. 🙂 My final score ended up being 136. I was ECSTATIC! I couldn’t believe it. Beaming, smiling, cheering. I was so proud of myself! Not one tear on my hands, either. Just some sweaty skin that had peeled up, but no rips, no stigmata, no holes, no blisters. AWESOME. I laid on the ground in sheer relief and this huge rush of pride came over me. It was incredible.

My post on Facebook read:

I finished all my toes to bar and then completed 26 wall balls!!!!! My goal was just to finish the T2B. A year ago, I could barely do 10 at all, and tonight I did 50 in about 6 1/2 minutes. Eeeeeeee so excited! Thank you, Tom Stamper. 🙂 🙂 🙂

 Tom replied:

You crushed it! All I did was help you realize you could do it. My job is the easy one! That wall ball didn’t know what hit it….. 26 reps in under a minute….. Wow

 Beaming doesn’t describe it. I was ecstatic. I couldn’t believe it. Progress. THIS is progress!! Slow, steady, beautiful progress.

Conquered 14.4. 🙂